Turning Doubt and Uncertainty into Hope Danielle Rogers April 13, 2017 Enlightenment, Spirituality, Words of Wisdom “Hope In Uncertain Times” is a 21-Day Guided Meditation created by Oprah Winfrey & Deepak Chopra, to learn more click here. “There was never a night or a problem that could defeat sunrise or hope.” – Bernard Williams Self-doubt and fear in the face of uncertainty can paralyze us and blind us to the good options that are available. Even in the midst of doubt and uncertainty, we always have within us the creative capacity to meet the situation and make use of it for our personal development and growth. In today’s meditation, we find that when hope is awakened in the silence of meditation, we become self-confident and fearless. This allows us to look at uncertainty calmly and clearly, and to find the opportunities for growth and new possibilities. “Hope In Uncertain Times” is a 21-Day Guided Meditation created by Oprah Winfrey & Deepak Chopra, to learn more click here. CENTERING THOUGHT: Hope makes me strong and secure. SANSKRIT MANTRA: Eem Hreem Kleem (I radiate confidence and strength.) 1.) Taking responsibility for your own life opens the way for hope to support you. Write down three recent events that have been difficult for you. Then, shut your eyes and envision each one, taking a few deep breaths if there is emotional charge around them. Say to yourself, “That’s where I was then. I am in a new place now.” Write down how your new place feels. For example, I am not as angry, I don’t feel resentful anymore, the hurt is getting better. In this way, you accept where you are now rather than dwelling on the past. Thinking I lost my mother’s ring. So essentially life has not been perfect and it never will be. However, I would be lying if I said I didn’t feel like this has been the best life has had to offer me thus far. I’ve said it before and I will say it again. As odd as it may sound; I find that when I am vocal about my blessings, my faith, and/or my happiness, something comes along to attempt to shift my state of being. For the most part, as I’ve grown, I can see and feel the test thus allowing me to maneuver through efficiently. Having gone through so much and through so many changes, I’ve told myself that if I can sustain and thrive through losing both parents at an early age then everything else is miniscule. So here is where the fun begins. My year has been great, business is doing well, my relationships are positive and thriving, I’m essentially feeling like I have the Bruce Leroy glow. I’m thankful, I’m humble, I’m good. There’s things falling into place that I haven’t shared with the public and things that have been in place that I’m beginning to reveal. Everything that scares me, I’m addressing head on and coming out on the other side stronger, wiser, and more confident. Fast forward to a weekend that has been in the works for months and you have me and some friends out of town for a wedding. It’s not the typical out of control hang as we have all grown and matured a bit but it was still definitely a hang. The weekend went well, I was moving in my office the day after returning home. I was on a life high. I knew where we all had been and the fighting we had to do to obtain this sense of peace and I was proud of that, for all of us. I literally was telling myself there’s nothing anyone can say or do to alter this space that I was in. As the week went on I thought I had misplaced something but I also remembered that I hadn’t full unpacked so I didn’t panic in the slightest. As I got around to unpacking and backtracking my steps, I realized that I could not find my mother’s ring. In short, last week was ugly for me. I didn’t spiral, I didn’t fold, but internally I was fighting and I was fighting hard. I found myself feeling like I was when I had lost my mother and flirting with real inner turmoil. I literally told myself that I was going to be cold again to a certain extent. It wasn’t about the ring, it wasn’t about my mother. It was mostly about the disappointment I felt in regards to myself along with subtle guilt for feeling like I may have let myself be a little too free thus becoming irresponsible. My mind went from every spectrum of thought to the other and back again. For the entire week it felt like nothing was going right and the more I tried to find the ring the further it seemed to be. The further it seemed to be the more hardened I started to become. I was broken and I was trying to be ok but in all reality, I wasn’t. I told myself of how I was going to be from this point forward and no one was going to be able to change that. In the end, I found my ring lol. But only after I relinquished control and actually had a talk with God and rationalizing with myself on how I would be ok. I learned many lessons last week mostly about myself, but a few about others as well. So all in all I feel completely better. So ultimately, the next difficult thing was a direct result of the situation above. Me going through these changes publicly although I thought I was being somewhat chill, led to a situation that is currently bothering me. During my wedding trip I was blessed enough to have a meeting that went very well and in turn set the foundation for a new relationship in my business. In short, I wake up this morning and check my social networks as I normally do and see these posts from the individual that I met with. Just as I go to message her and say, “hey, these posts kind of hit home” and elaborate a bit, I see that the individual had removed me form her pages. I’m like “oh ok” this clearly must be about me. However, then again I do not know but like I said, they hit home a bit. The gist was about judging others and essentially being a condescending asshole, not knowing what someone could be going through and how you could be the catalyst in their demise ultimately. Couple this with the fact that I’ve been watching “13 Reasons Why” my mind just travelled down so many different paths. But back to the difficulty, I don’t know if this person was referring to me or not but I do know that I have been outside of myself. I also know who I am and who I am not. Do I know what will happen with this relationship, no I don’t. Initially the uncertainty behind that was unsettling; one for the simply fact that no matter who you are, you care how people may perceive you. Secondly, because although my business is doing well, I’m still growing and you never want to lose business or potentially taint the image of what you have worked so hard to build. Time will tell on this one but from a personal perspective, I feel a bit more at peace. The last difficulty is more practical. I’m unsure if it’s even a difficulty but more so just life happening as it does. We plan, we prepare, and then life just goes BOOM. So although things have been going well, there’s been just as many mishaps to attempt to chip away at the progress. This hasn’t effected me to the point where it’s life altering, it’s just more so inconveniences. As far as this goes, what’s done is done and I’m just blessed to be able to take care of things because there was a time when I couldn’t. 2.) When things aren’t going your way at work or in a relationship, what is your reaction? These are periods of uncertainty, difficult times when things are in transition. Journal about such a situation and your typical reaction. Now take a breath and connect to your creative core self, and imagine a different reaction that would allow you to feel hopeful and capable. Write down this reimagined outcome. When things go awry from what I had or have planned in my mind, I always try and process it internally first. Once I cannot do this or if I am having a hard time getting centered, I usually consult with someone I trust. Sometimes this helps, sometimes it makes it worse but experience has taught me that no one can go at anything alone. On a normal basis the buck stops here but there are some instances, most recent being “the ring” where I can’t get past the feelings that I am experiencing. I’ve already reimagined the outcome but what’s done is done. I just believe there were some lessons that needed to be had and God needed to reel me in for a second. 3.) An attitude of openness makes every day hopeful, while expectations close the door. Describe three things you feel uncertain about at work, in your relationships, or in the world at large. For each one, write down your expectations, both good and bad. Now read these over and say to yourself, “I am open to any possibility. I release my expectations and let go of them.” Being a small business owner there is always uncertainty in regards to work but my faith supersedes that. I know there will be good and bad but I also know that I am in my purpose. My expectations don’t lie in that of man but more so act as a testament of my faith in God. Although we can sometimes attempt not to have expectations in people, it’s only natural. I put a lot of expectations on people and I know it’s unwarranted. However, I also know it’s partially based on my abilities, willingness, and loyalty as a person. Doesn’t make it fair but again, I am only human. As far as the world goes, I expect it to always be what it is. Chaotic. This doesn’t mean there aren’t good people and safe places. To me, this just means I know that people go and grow at different rates if they do grow at all. I am open to the goodness of people but I feel in this regard I am also a realist. 4.) Daily Reflection: Sometimes in life the aggressor becomes the prey and the prey the aggressor. Sometimes the beacon of hope needs a spark and sometimes the broken can’t be fixed. There is no right or wrong way to go about life and along the way we will all offend or be offended. Should we show the offender the same courtesy as the offended? Do we stop to ask if they are broken and need to be replenished. All of our behaviors be they positive or negative stem from some action, feeling, or lack thereof. Every day we take in what people are projecting and some days it’s more potent than others. What we must never forget is that we are all human and we all feel. Just because someone is different than you doesn’t make them wrong. Just because someone heals differently than you doesn’t make it incorrect. We all could use and give a little more compassion. We all could use a little more filter as well. Social networking is one of my biggest struggles, I find often times it’s a “damned if you if do, damned if you don’t” situation. But at the end of the day we all know what our intentions are but we cannot control how others receive them. We also can’t be mad if someone calls us on our shit especially when we know that we are/were dead wrong. Be careful of the battles you may find yourself fighting because like I said, trying to come at one you can offend a multitude. Attempting to discredit someone else can quickly backfire on you. Not saying that was my particular situation but I see it happening every day. People are so hell bent on being shady, they don’t even realize they’re speaking of their own friends, family members, let alone themselves. Where’s is the accountability, where is the balance, where is the hope? “Hope In Uncertain Times” is a 21-Day Guided Meditation created by Oprah Winfrey & Deepak Chopra, to learn more click here.